Labor and Delivery 101

In the last month, I've had 3 various occasions while chatting with strangers or acquaintances where I've been told "You're a labor and delivery nurse!? That must be so fun getting to rock and play with babies all night." 

Truth is, that couldn't be any further from the truth. I simply nod and smile, agreeing that I do indeed love what I do, and agreeing that yes, it WOULD be fun to rock and play with babies all night, if that's what my job entailed. The fact of the matter is, the time I actually spend with the newborn is minimal.

The best way I can describe labor (totally subjective), is an out of body experience. Besides the excruciating pain, which is the most obvious thing you think of, there's the nausea, the pressure, the uncontrollable shaking, the fear/anxiety of what to expect and of course, the exhaustion. I think I've unintentionally, mentally blocked out of the majority of my labor, but I vividly remember at one point feeling like I was the lead in "The Exorcist", waiting for my head to start spinning at any minute. There's nothing that could've prepared me for labor, and I do this for a living....

My job as a labor nurse is NOT to rock and snuggle babies. The mother just worked so hard to deliver that baby, her body unknowingly just did a triathlon. SHE deserves to snuggle that baby. To look into its tiny, beautiful eyes and know that what she just experienced was not for nothing. 

My job is to support a woman when she's at her most vulnerable state. When she's scared or anxious, when her body is weak and tired, when she's trying to catch her breath in between the pain of contractions or pushing. To be on her side, to labor with her. My job is to be silent but present when my patient is trying to hypnobirth or having her partner as a labor coach. To offer advice, education, or recommendations when needed. To be non-biased of her beliefs, preferences and goals, but to remind her of why certain things need to be done from a medical stand point.

I have laughed with patients, as they stared at their baby, pointing out each tiny feature and running down the family tree trying to decide who the baby might look like. I have cried with patients when situations don't turn out as expected. I have prayed with patients and their families, held their hands, offered distraction or conversation, and sat in silence, letting them know my presence was there. I have been vomited on, bear hugged, and soaked head to toe while trying to monitor a patient who could only find comfort standing in the shower. 

Labor isn't always like you see in the movies. It can be long and non progressive. Patients will spend the majority of their pregnancies planning each detail about the birth and in one quick moment during labor, that whole plan can go out the window. As nurses, we WANT everything to go accordingly. We hope and pray for positive outcomes. We feel joy and and a sense of accomplishment when labor goes as planned. Unfortunately, that's not always the case. It's my job to come up with modifications to try to stick with the patient's plan as closely as possible when medical circumstances prevent them from having what was previously desired. To empower a woman, to help her find strength and faith in the situation. If or when a patient is ready to throw in the towel and get pain medication, it is my job to tell her that it's OKAY! That labor effing hurts! That there's no gold star for not getting medication and she has NOT let herself, her partner or me down. My most important goal when caring for someone is "safe mom and safe baby" and I will remind patient's of that. All the other details are just preferences, a guideline to follow but not to mold to. 

Like any job, my job can be frustrating. Sometimes communication can be lacking or it's difficult to see eye to eye with a patient. Sometimes I leave work sad when I have a challenging patient. Sometimes the patient is in so much pain, that you can't talk them down or your go to "bag of tricks" doesn't help. I have accepted that I cannot change the world but if I have made even the tiniest difference for the better, then I know I succeeded. 

Labor and delivery is hardcore. It's specialized and it's intimate. It's never just black and white or cut and dry. There are so many considerations and emotions involved. My coworkers amaze me everyday. I see them advocating for their patients, supporting and comforting them. Going out of their ways to meet the patient half way when it seems impossible to do so. Making referrals and offering resources to patients who may not have everything figured out. I have learned from them and continue to do so every shift. We are a family. It is definitely not a job for the meek or faint hearted. There are nights so crazy busy that we don't sit, we don't pee and a lunch break is considered inhaling food in 5 minutes at the desk while answering call bells and watching the fetal heart monitor.

Truth is, I love what I do. It's welcoming new life, or tragically saying goodbye too soon. It's rewarding and challenging. It's nerve-wracking and intense, joyous and heartbreaking. I LOVE snuggling babies and do occasionally while stamping footprints or at patient's request, but the look on a new mom or dad's face as they meet their child for the first time after a long wait, the instant love that explodes a room, THAT'S what keeps me going!

#perspective

Much love friends!
Katelyn